What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Have you ever followed through being bi-curious?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why is porn so addictive?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

How could NASA possibly land on the moon when it's impossible to reach the moon through the Earth's dome? Why are they making up such an obvious lie?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

How does the narcissist react when he realizes you no longer care?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

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In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Why would an older small breed dog become obsessive about hygiene?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Can you explain the meaning of "mint condition" in relation to antiques or collectibles?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Nintendo Switch 2 sets all-time launch record for hardware in the US, beating PS4 - Video Games Chronicle

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

How do I cope with the fact that I will never have a girlfriend?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

What is the most craziest dream you ever had?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

TEXT:

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.